Marriage: God's Way
Ok. I'm going to be honest. I knew of a few types of marriage. You know, the traditional marriage, open marriage, same-sex marriage, arranged marriage and common law marriage. I had absolutely no idea that there were other kinds! Our second speaker gave us a list of quite a few other ones and needless to say, most of us were shaking our heads as she gave explanations to some of them. But we would be focusing on God's way.
The "worldly way" (as she described it) of finding a spouse has things a little twisted. Again, the MAN is suppose to find his wife. Not the other way around. But hey, let's be honest, us women have a good time looking for the man we believe is suppose to be our husband. In doing so, we have "The List". You know the list: does he have a job, how much money does he make, how attractive is he, what kind of car does he drive, blah blah blah. It's more so like a business deal. We discuss things like retirement, who's going to be the main person to do the cleaning and taking care of the kids. Stuff like that. So many of us miss out on what could be the one for us because we are so busy sticking to this list and looking for that man, instead of letting him come to us.
While you are waiting for your husband to find you, you should be busy doing the LORD's work. Now that would definitely make him view you in a positive manner. Rather than finding you in the club in your booty shorts, bent over touching your toes, dancing to the latest booty popping song and viewing you probably less than you are worth! Get my point?
You and your husband "should" be dedicated to God. And I'll admit, our marriage didn't start off God's way. We had that same conversation above. We even asked each other what did we plan to accomplish in 5-10 years from that day. Slowly but surely, we have started giving our marriage over to God. And there have been some great changes in both of us and in the marriage.
Some tips she gave to the married people:
1. Be submissive to your husband. Submissive NOT subservient. There is a difference ladies.
2. Work together. Sit down and make plans together. Work out the finances together. Especially if he is the primary breadwinner. Because if something happens to him, how will you know how to take care of yourself? What bills need to be paid? WHERE most of your money is?
3. Have a date night! That is something I was told by an older gentleman in regards to keeping your marriage strong. You have to continue dating your spouse. You don't just pull all your tricks out of your bag while dating each other and then do nothing once you say I Do.
4. Don't let yourself go. Yeah. She said it ladies. And it's true! Just like I said above, you were pulling all your tricks out of your bag to get him to marry you, you were also dressing great and keeping yourself up. Don't let that go by the way side either. Keep yourself looking nice so you can keep his attention. I know it's hard when you have kids and all, but we have to make the effort at least. You don't have to be overly provocative but, as I like to say, classy sexy!
5. Do everything you are suppose to as a wife. "I'm doing this and that and he has yet to make any changes in his behavior". Ladies, if you have a marriage God's way, you have to remember it's not about you or your husband but about God. And God told you you were suppose to bring good not harm to your husband and that's what we are suppose to be doing. Plain and simple.
6. Adapt to your mate. If he likes going fishing, go fishing with him. If golf is his thing, head on out to the greens with him. And take turns. He should do something that you like as well.
7. COMMUNICATE! This is always the straw that breaks the camel's back. So often communication gets lost in a marriage. Work, school or kids can get you so worked up and stressed out that you forget to take the time to just talk to your spouse. Or you remember but you just can't fit that into your schedule. Make the time.
Pretty easy tips right? I thought so. She also said that when she leaves her day job, she likes to tell people she's going home to start her REAL job "Cook Clean and Please!". I like that!!! Matter of fact, I'm about to get off this post and go do just that!
Until next post....
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Marriage: God's Way